Score: 1

"What the hell?"

submission: Satoshi: Master of Time

date: December 13, 2007

Well, you might as well tell us the secret right in your description, because no one is going to stare at this thing for longer than ten seconds to find out what it is. I wish I could give a more constructive review, but really, this thing is a mess. What's the point? It's not really a game per se, and it definitely isn't a movie. It's just a bunch of stuff moving. That might work well on three year olds, but you're going to have a hard time impressing people whose ages are in the double digits, man. Sorry.

Score: 5

"Looks slick"

submission: Labyrinth: The Unknown

date: December 13, 2007

It really does look slick, but it would benefit greatly from some music! Also, whenever you die, it's a bit tedious to take us back to your logo and then the menu screen. It would work much more efficiently if you just offered a "play again?" option after you die. Keep up the good work.

Score: 10

"Fantastic!"

submission: Ghosts by the Road

date: August 1, 2007

Oh, what a nice cartoon! There are philosophical implications here about ghosts that are just wonderful, of course, but at the same time, the real strength in this movie is in the characters' nuanced and playful interactions with each other. This is the type of thing that you may overhear a close group of friends talking about at a restaurant, or in the locker room of a gym, granted if the group of friends in question happened to be four charming animals. They beat around the bush, they repeat themselves, they argue, and they don't really get anywhere with their efforts, but there's something so endearingly HUMAN about the whole process that it's impossible to complain about its meandering.

It's nothing earth-shattering storywise, but that's exactly what's so refreshing about it; it revels in its own simplicity. Something jam-packed with action or some horrible conflict or situation is a challenge in and of itself, of course, but there's still something to be said for being able to pull off something intricate and subtle, just as you've done here. I especially like how the sketchy visuals play up the whimsical and simple story. The animation is absolutely beautiful. I like this story because it makes me feel that cartoons still have a lot to say; just as much as anything filmed in live-action. We need more animations like this.

Score: 8

"HA HA HA HA!"

submission: LUL BLAMED

date: August 1, 2007

Very creative! I've never seen anyone make a Flash movie with the sole purpose of pointing out how hypocritical Newgrounds reviews can be. I don't know where some of these kids get off... Reviews are supposed to be constructive. More often than not at this site, however, it's just another account that people can log in to for the ridiculous purpose of screaming totally unfounded insults at people they don't know because they're trying to make up for their shitty offline life.

That was a very funny twist at the end (PERFECT music choice, by the way). Your accent is also very cool.
Keep up the great work!

Score: 5

"Bloody chavs..."

submission: one day in chav street

date: July 31, 2007

I'm not going to lie; I was tickled by this. You've got really interesting character designs in this movie, and if I could understand what was being said (get a new mic!) I'm sure it would have been pretty funny as well.

Work on the sound, but don't lose your flair for inventive visuals. They were easily the best part. I'd say they were quirky and slightly off-putting, in that kitschy 'South Park' kind of way. Good job!

Score: 4

"LOL - Odd!"

submission: Lick That Toaster

date: July 31, 2007

This is good for a laugh, but my only gripe is that it is a bit too short. Otherwise, it's got a great style, and a really funny and weirdly appropriate music choice.

Keep up the good work!

Score: 2

"The music needs volume control."

submission: Hentai Bliss RPG 3

date: July 22, 2007

Is there any way you could add an option to turn off that goddamn music?
Thrash rock is fine if you're not trying to read, but it's really irritating when you are.
Anyhow, does that really seem like the best music choice for a game about having sex? You'd be much better off with something instrumental or something that actually sounds kind of sexy.

Score: 7

"It wasn't as funny as the first one..."

submission: Sonic:Search for love 1-2

date: July 22, 2007

...but it was still yards better than most stuff that passes for humor at this website!

Did you guys find a shitty lemon fanfic or something, or was this your own material (please, God, no)? It sounds like someone with dyslexia wrote it. And they don't even speak English. And they're from Cambodia. AND THEY HAVE NO SOUL...

I'm really impressed with the sound quality in these movies, too, by the way. It sounds like a professional recording studio. I guess it should... The budget definitely didn't go to the visuals! ;-)
Keep up the awesome work! I haven't had a laugh this good at Newgrounds in years.

Score: 5

"Heh."

submission: Libidinous Prince

date: July 21, 2007

That's a pretty romantic story.

Animation-wise, I really would have liked to have seen more stuff other than the looped animations that made up the bulk of the film. But the narration was really good and tongue-in-cheek, and the sex was sufficiently sexy, so ah, who's complainin'...

Score: 5

"Since you wanted reviews more than anything..."

submission: ELK Fables: Preview

date: July 21, 2007

Your idea sounds good, but you only TOLD us what the story is supposed to be in the comment box of the animation page: you didn't SHOW us. Rule #1 of all filmmaking: if you can show what's happening instead of say what's happening, BY ALL MEANS, DO IT THAT WAY! I understand that this is only a teaser, of course, but the principle still applies.

Aesthetically speaking, your characters look fine, but you might want to work a little more on the backgrounds. Make them eye-popping and interesting. As they stand now, they're just a couple of lines filled in with some gradients. The key to making animation that really catches people's attention is in creating wonderful backgrounds that the characters can seamlessly interact with. If you work on that, people will notice, and it will show in your final score.

You've got a long, tedious road ahead of you, but stay the course and remember that though you may feel like killing yourself, ALL animation takes ridiculous amounts of time and patience.